It's the climb

We climbed a volcano. This is what we looked like when we finally (!!!) got to the top. Nothing to see but clouds, but clouds are pretty cool. 

I was more emotional than this happy face shows. A 1500m climb is a lot. It is when you really get to see how your mind and body work together, that being strong is a choice. When do you push? When do you just give in to enjoy the view? 

Although the view while going up was amazing, at the top there was nothing to see. So This the clouds made me look inside. I saw how far I have come. 

We did a similar hike 4 years ago, in another part of the world. And I was just as baffled at the top. It was right after my recovery, after letting this body back into the picture. That climb was the first major physical thing I did after healing, and I got to the top. Then and there that body gained some serious trust. I guess that was when I realized we could work together. 

Today was hard, but did not feel nearly as crazy as the one 4 years ago. But he said this one was way harder. And so I am baffled again. At how far I have come. How this time it was me and my body all along. Together. Becoming a yoga teacher, eating in a different way, feeling in a more complete way, letting life happen as it wants to. Stop being in control. 

I saw that what I have been doing in between these climbs is working. It lets me eat powerbars along the way because I need them eventhough it messes up my "structure". The guides did not really let us take a lunch break during these 9 hours. It lets me eat spaghetti, at 4pm, when we get back, exhausted and hungry. It lets me enjoy it all. 

What I have been doing these last few years is working. It gets me to the top. And back down. 

Because the way down somehow was even harder than the way up. Which is a big lesson in itself. Accepting that you have to fall on your face 5 times because the rocks are so slippery, after you thought the hard part was over. After being so proud. Ego, step back. 

Also he was there with me on both climbs, making me laugh like that at the top. Wich says more than I can put into words. 

Also we saw monkeys. 

Also that Miley Cyrus song "It's the climb" is stuck init my head now. 

Ok, bye.